Trying Vegetarianism

Title kind of gives today’s topic away but I’ve decided to try being vegetarian!!ย I have a load of friends who are vegetarian/vegan, for various reasons, and honestly their arguments make sense to me. Other than being unsustainable, bad for out environment and cruel, I also noticed that meat is one of the two main contributors to my calorie intake (the other being my insatiable lust for everything potato :/ ).

So instead of focusing a meal around meat, I’m going to use healthier alternatives. This is also an opportunity to force myself to try new foods, or try to use foods I thought I hated (like mushrooms and bananas).

However there is another aspect of this too, I’m reducing the amount of lactose and gluten I eat as well. My family has a history of both coeliac disease (intolerance to gluten which damages the lining of the intestines) and being lactose intolerant, and I have noticed recently that my insides haven’t always agreed with what I have been eating. I have a feeling this is more to do with the lactose than anything else, which is why I have already switched to soy milk (which is delicious!) and have avoided things like ice cream and milk shakes.

 

So yeah, I’ve decided to give this a shot, it may not last and that ok, but in the meantime I am enjoying making healthier meals for myself (aka lower calorie) without having to be sneaky about it. This also makes it easier to refuse food, ‘oh I can’t sorry I’m vegetarian/GF/lactose intolerant’, and means I have to order the lower cal options if I am out with friends. Win win!

Ps. I really want to try nice cream! Made mostly from blended frozen bananas and whatever flavouring you want (i.e. cacao powder for chocolate nice cream, frozen mango, strawberries, blueberries or coconut). Looks amazing, is healthier and way less cals than actual ice cream! Plus no lactose/gluten ๐Ÿ˜€

 

Later lovelies!
Xx
R

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Failure

Hey guys,

Sorry about not writing for a little bit. I was to ashamed to write on here about everything that’s been happening lately because I had a week of failure. I’m embarrassed about it, so much so that I couldn’t bring myself to share my calorie intakes with you all because sometimes I didn’t even add it all up I was so afraid. All I know is that since my last post I’ve gained almost a kilo of weight. And I’m struggling. With life and friends and health.

 

So thank you all so much for always being here, and being so understanding and forgiving. It’s so god damn cathartic to write about things here and I should have remembered that this last week. You’re all so amazing!

 

The main thing that I’ve been struggling with is going out constantly for food with people. Because I’m always hanging out with friends I’m constantly getting to my hungriest state when I’m out of the house with all of my binge foods only a few steps away. And on top of that the people I’m with expect us to get food. That lead to me eating like 500-600cal meals, even when I only ate parts of my meal. And after a few days of eating nice foods out I began to feel that wth I’ve already ruined my restricting so much I may as well make it worth it and eat whatever the hell I want!

Bad idea.

But now I know the cycle hopefully I can stop it. Hopefully I can cut myself off more, avoid certain places, bring enough money for only the lowest calorie meal, or even avoid eating out at places if I can. Hopefully.

 

Other than that the one thing I was looking forward to this week, picking up yoga, was cancelled. My friend bailed on me, which hurt a lot. I really needed to go, so I’m thinking that once I get paid today, I’ll go by myself during the day to a beginner level class. I’m a bit terrified tbh. More than a little terrified. Which is why I wanted to go with a friend but I can’t wait, I need to go because I need the peace it fosters.

 

Anyway, this is a super long post so I’ll stop now,

Love you all,
Xx

R

Forgetful and Ok

Today went ok.

I was running late this morning for my lecture, probably because I was busy writing my last post but I needed to release my stress somewhere. Anyway, I was 3 streets away from my house when I remembered that I had left my paperwork on the floor of my bedroom, but I didn’t have the time to turn my little car around if I wanted to make it to my first lecture of the semester on time. Onward it was.

Despite abandoning my paperwork, I was actually still 5 minutes late for my lecture as parking is always a nightmare AND I had no idea where this lecture theatre was! For some reason my Ancient Roman History lecture is in the Law Building?? Right… Ok sure.

The lecture itself was really cool. It’s a lecture I’ve had before and he’s just so enthusiastic and casual. He makes learning about the minutiae of Rome actually fun.

After uni I hopped across to the shopping centre, where I spent about and hour and half wandering about the shops. I ended up buying four new necklaces. Two of them I grabbed because the amethyst in them called out to me, and when I read the properties of amethyst it seemed pretty appropriate. Still not sure if I full believe in the power of crystals, but it can’t hurt, especially as amethysts are supposed to protect and heal.

I also got the cutest little crop 3/4 sleeve jumper! It’s got horizontal stripes of black, grey and pink on it and is just adorable! Can’t wait to feel confident enough to wear it ๐Ÿ˜€

Most importantly though I bought SOOOOOO many amazing bath bombs and creams from Lush!! I swear, I spend so much money there hahaha! I bought 4 new bath bombs, 4 bubble bath crumbles, 2 moisturisers and a skin melt too. I then had a 2 hour long soak when I got home using a rosewood and lavender bubble bath crumble. It was divine.

Finished my day by watching youtube clips, painted my nails, did a short 20 min workout and put my paperwork in my bag in preparation for tomorrow. There’ll be no forgetting it this time!

 

Anyway, sorry for the long post. I just had a pretty good day.

Calories: 900 – 270 (walking/exercise) = 630

0.5kg till my 1st goal weight!!

Have an amazing day/night guys,
xox

R

Back at Uni

So today is my first day back at uni, my lecture starts in 40 minutes and I’m already struggling with motivation levels! D:

I woke up feeling tired and lazy, and all I wanted to do was stay in bed and play a game, but I forced myself to get out of bed. I had like an hour long shower but it helped boost my mood a lot. I felt too nervous to eat though, but I cut up an apple for when I’m out and about.

I also have to hand in some uni paperwork which is about 3 weeks over due. Omg why are we still even doing hard copies, everything else I have to do is online submissions! -.-

Anyway, I lost about 0.6kg and my cal intake yesterday was about 700. It was going to be only 470 but I caved and rationed out 200cal worth of gummi worms because I was feeling kinda shitty mentally last night. But I still feel ok about yesterday, and I think I needed the little sugar hit.

What that means though is I am only 0.5kg from my very first goal weight! EEEEEEE! Other than my major set back last weekend, I feel soย great. My love handles are slowly disappearing! Fingers crossed that I can lose that 0.5 in 1-2 days.

My reward is going to be getting my nails done, I’d love any colour/cut/design suggestions!

Have a great day lovelies,
xox

R

Trying to stay Positive

Yesterday was disgusting. I binged all day, eating so many carbs and cals I’m too scared to actually add them all up!! I just kept shoveling food into my face until my stomach hurt and I felt sick. I won’t even bother to list my intake, just knowย that it was more than I’ve eaten all week ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

I was praying that it wouldn’t have a huge effect, I hoped I could resist standing on the scales when I was finally home alone, but it did and I couldn’t. Almost a kilo gain! D: Two bad days in a row and almost a weeks worth of effort down the drain.

 

I’m trying to stay positive though. It’s just a set back. Today I’ll do better. I’ve liquid fasted for almost 18 hours now. Convinced my friend to grab food to go and meet me at mine, saying I’d already had lunch, and thankfully dad is preparing an ok dinner. I’d rather skip it but I’m not having a single carb today. I’ll have the veggies and some of the chicken.

God, I just want to get to my first goal and I was so close! Tomorrow I’m home alone all day so I’m going to fast until dinner again (when I’ll have to eat because of my family) and Tuesday/Wednesday I have some classes back at uni, so I’ll be able to fast until dinner again.

1.5kg left before my first goal weight. Wish me luck.

 

R

Tired and Excited

So today went better than expected!

My psych appointment went amazingly well, I came out of it feeling less stressed and more in control of my life. We’re focusing on my trying to find ways to be less overwhelmed by life, and I was set two tasks until my next appointment, hand in some paperwork that’s overdue and research on where I can start doing yoga (which is something I’ve been interested in for yeeeeaaaars). I was so excited that I’ve already found out where I want to go and am planning on going there next week with a friend ๐Ÿ™‚

I did however struggle with food today, I was so hungry! I indulged in an emotional hot chocolate after my appointment as a little pick me up, but thankfully only ended up drinking about 1/4 of it! So proud! I also had half an apple for lunch (at 2pm). I started to feel shakey and lightheaded by 5pm and grabbed an early dinner, but I was out and caved and got my favourite, fatty meal. We’re talkin wedges, red meat, bacon, cheese and gravy. And holy shit did I devour it. I swear I was one step away from becoming an animal :/

That brought my total calorie count to insanely high today, but I did 200 jumping jacks this morning and spent 7 hours on my feet at work, so hopefully that helped bring it down a bit.

I won’t be able to do a weigh in until Sunday now (it’s friday currently for me), so wish me luck! Here’s for another 0.8kg loss!!

Stay amazing,
xox

R

Nervous

So I have a psychologist appointment this morning that’s making my stomach roll. I’ve been to her before and she’s lovely, I just hope she doesn’t ask about my eating habits/weight loss :/ I’ve got a list of things that I need to talk about anyway so hopefully it doesn’t come up! I am looking forward to the opportunity to talk about the seemingly endless things that have been stressing me lately, like starting back at uni in a few weeks time and all the crazy stuff that’s related to that.

In other news I weighed in this morning, and I lost another 0.6kg ๐Ÿ˜€ Slowly but surely making progress. I’m only another 0.6kg from my first goal weight. I’m keeping my goals small and achievable so that I can stay motivated and focused. My first little reward will be getting my nails done ๐Ÿ™‚ I’m so excited!

I’d love to hear if you have any colour/design suggestions! Just remember that I’m suuuuper pale and blonde ๐Ÿ™‚

Stay lovely,
xox

R